Everlasting Arms

My experience with death has been limited to two cats and a parakeet until an old friend died recently. He was one of those who kept up with you even when you were so bad at keeping up. It was like you just picked up where you left off even when you only saw him a few times a year. In the days following the news of his death all I could think about was we hadn’t made spending time with him a priority, we hadn’t told him we loved him enough.

I have been at a loss at to what to say to his wife. All those spiritual things you say to people… you know them, come up empty. They sound so shallow and superficial and meaningless. Of course we know they have great meaning and endless depth, but in the grip of sorrow and grief, they ring hollow.

I’ve decided that’s where relationship becomes paramount. If you just go to church, stand up, sit down, sing, listen to a sermon, leave and that’s the sum total of your walk with God, there’s nothing to fall back on when wrenching grief racks your very soul.

If your walk includes relationship, there is.

The reason is…there is nothing to say. There is nothing to say that will make anyone feel better when the grief is so fresh, so raw. Words are hollow.

I think the one thing that can comfort is silence in the presence of God if you know him as father. It’s kind of like watching a sunset as a kid, sitting on the end of a dock with your dad. His arm is around you, the sky is breathtaking, there are no words. You sit in silence and just watch the show.

Fast forward to your teens. You’re dumped by a guy whom you loved deeply. There are no words. Your dad sits with you on the sofa, his arm around you, in silence. You just absorb his strength and his love.

Deuteronomy 33:27 says, “The eternal God is a dwelling place (a refuge), and underneath are the everlasting arms.”

There will be a time for words with meaning. But for now, if you have a relationship with him as Father, those silent everlasting arms can provide immeasurable comfort.